I have decided, for a bit of fun, to create a list of 'pente talk' and their transalations. They are, afterall, always talking about interpretations!
The left column is what a pente might say, and on the right, its real meaning.
"Just go with God" = Don't think, just do what the pastor says.
"We are all at different stages of our walk" = we are all at different stages of being deluded, either by the pastor or ourselves.
"Submit to leadership" = do as we say, don't question us or we might have to actually think and study the word of God.
"If you don't know what to pray, just pray in tongues" = Make yourself feel more holy by talking nonsense.
"We need to reach out to the lost and hurt out there" = we need more people to buy into our stageshow.
"Don't worry about the person next to you or anyone else when you're being slayed" = Don't think about how ridiculous you are for what you are doing.
"Let's give something back to God" = put some money in the offering plate.
"We are all saints, kings and queens" = Basically we are as good as any theologion, priest, monk, nun etc. even if we don't even know what theology is.
"Move in the gifts" = Act dumb, don't think or study about it in the bible, get others to think like you.
"It's important to spend quality time in fellowship" = Be around the others so you aren't on your own where you might think or study Pentecostalism.
"We need a revival" = We need a circus like hysteria to try and prove to "nonbelievers, or non-pentecostalists" that we know what we are doing.
I'm sure there are many, may others - Please add to this if you've got some other funny ones. Anything added will make it more funny though.
The left column is what a pente might say, and on the right, its real meaning.
"Just go with God" = Don't think, just do what the pastor says.
"We are all at different stages of our walk" = we are all at different stages of being deluded, either by the pastor or ourselves.
"Submit to leadership" = do as we say, don't question us or we might have to actually think and study the word of God.
"If you don't know what to pray, just pray in tongues" = Make yourself feel more holy by talking nonsense.
"We need to reach out to the lost and hurt out there" = we need more people to buy into our stageshow.
"Don't worry about the person next to you or anyone else when you're being slayed" = Don't think about how ridiculous you are for what you are doing.
"Let's give something back to God" = put some money in the offering plate.
"We are all saints, kings and queens" = Basically we are as good as any theologion, priest, monk, nun etc. even if we don't even know what theology is.
"Move in the gifts" = Act dumb, don't think or study about it in the bible, get others to think like you.
"It's important to spend quality time in fellowship" = Be around the others so you aren't on your own where you might think or study Pentecostalism.
"We need a revival" = We need a circus like hysteria to try and prove to "nonbelievers, or non-pentecostalists" that we know what we are doing.
I'm sure there are many, may others - Please add to this if you've got some other funny ones. Anything added will make it more funny though.
