well we have all left the pente church (or at least most of us
we all see how it was wrong in various ways.. but I was just wondering does anyone still struggle with left over guilt from their pente days ?
because I do.. and to a certain extent I don't get it.. I mean I am out, I am here, I am taking a program in university that pentes would never approve of, I read harry potter, I drink beer, I listen to non christian music, hold politically liberal views..(and I don't particularly feel bad about any of these things..) In practical ways I am moving on with my life but somehow still it seems all the guilt of my past life catches up to me.. not about things that I do now.. but about things that happened back then, the constant feeling of never being able to measure up.. never having the right personality/the ability to fake things/put on a show/keep up a good reputation for my mother..
it's like the guilt.. the feeling of being a bad person is still there..
i was just wondering if it is like this for other people ? do you still feel the guilt from your pente days ?
because I do.. and to a certain extent I don't get it.. I mean I am out, I am here, I am taking a program in university that pentes would never approve of, I read harry potter, I drink beer, I listen to non christian music, hold politically liberal views..(and I don't particularly feel bad about any of these things..) In practical ways I am moving on with my life but somehow still it seems all the guilt of my past life catches up to me.. not about things that I do now.. but about things that happened back then, the constant feeling of never being able to measure up.. never having the right personality/the ability to fake things/put on a show/keep up a good reputation for my mother..
it's like the guilt.. the feeling of being a bad person is still there..
i was just wondering if it is like this for other people ? do you still feel the guilt from your pente days ?
