I remember going to non church functions like my grandparents funerals and taking my kids to Easter egg hunts because my cousins asked me to bring them and it
was really strange. It was like visiting a Stephen King haunted house. Add to it that the church I grew up in is on the edge of town by a riverbed we all used
to play in and in our teens party and have sex in. It seemed so empty and old and stagnant. People ask me to bring my kids to the services and I want to scream
"HELL NO"! But I politely decline instead. I heard a new preacher and his whole family have came and taken over the whole church and its running and
that it is even more like a cult now than ever. I heard they have ran off everyone but like 20 old people. My cousin and his wife were the youth leaders when
they came and they fired them and put his son in charge and refused to let people know where he lived. My family got all butt hurt and left. But I do agree
with the new pastor that the girls shouldnt come to church dressed like the pussycat dolls and people shouldnt be drinking starbucks in church during the
service. What a mess! I'd love to win the lottery and buy the church and convert it to an Orthodox one, lol.
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Ever visted your old church for a funeral or non church event since leaving?
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 CharlesinCharge |
Ever visted your old church for a funeral or non church event since leaving? |
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Posts: 28 (12/11/08 10:35:58) |
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marla191792 |
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Posts: 1918 (12/11/08 10:44:41) Grace Abounds |
Never have, but saw a pic of it on the internet once (I don't think the pic is posted anymore). I agree that it's like looking at a haunted
house--strange, empty, and ... well.... haunted. No one was in the picture, but, in my mind, I can see so clearly myself and my family and friends sitting on
that short wall by the stairs or walking through that doorway. I can mentally see the interior of the building, and I can mentally follow that street out of
the picture and down the road to the house where we used to have lunches after church.
It's creepy. It's not happy, at all. If I could buy it, I'd have it bulldozed, not converted. It would be too creepy to even hold Presbyterian services there. |
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Looking4truth |
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Posts: 1928 (12/11/08 10:47:16) exPc Fan |
I had to go up to my parent's church last weekend. There church does this picture fundraiser where they sell picture packages and you bring your kids to
get "glamour" type of pics made. Well, my parents bought a picture and wanted the grandkids to get the pic made. So, that included my daughter and my
brother's kids. I went up their in shorts, a T-shirt, and my converse. lol I got plenty of looks and awkward glances, and even an "invite" to
come back. LOL I just smiled...did my business and left quietly. It wasn't any big deal...I realized that I was very "over it"...a lot more than
I thought I was.
Pascal wus clever kitteh hu wus laik: "I am not knoin if teh Ceiling Cat is reel." Oh noes! But
Pascal was thinkin an thinkin, an he wus laik "If I is beleefin in teh Ceiling Cat, and he is reel, I will be gettin cheezburger. But if I has no beleefin
in teh Ceiling Cat, and he is reel, I will be getting pwned. If there no Ceiling Cat, no matter anywai. I think I is beleefin in teh Ceiling
Cat."
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boustro |
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Posts: 4136 (12/11/08 10:55:18) There are some who call me .... Timmay! |
Been back for a couple of birthday parties in the fellowship hall. Yeah, it was weird. Lot of the people there were old church buddies, of course, but
strangely, almost nobody mentioned my absence or invited me back or anything like that. A couple of "we miss you"s is about it. I think they know why
I left, and it makes them uncomfortable to think about it, because they all have their own questions, but they're afraid to admit it.
Tim
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CharlesinCharge |
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Posts: 30 (12/11/08 11:02:25) |
I've noticed that either people treat you like a leper because they are self righteous or the secretly envy you because they are miserable but too scared
to leave.
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freedsorta |
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Posts: 40 (12/11/08 11:36:21) |
I have actually been back many times. My own family, my parents, and both families I married into, as well as my children's spouses were in that church. I
was born into it (poor me). So yes, over the years, there have been family who were still there. Now, the only ones still there are some of my own two sets of
in-laws.
So the first time I went back, it was to sing at the funeral of my daughter's father-in-law, but being the kind of man he was, I was glad to do it in his memory. I went back for my daughter-in-law's father';s funeral -- another great man. That was the day I realized how sour everyone looked. I was shocked! Even when they smiled, their smiles could not wipe off that gripping sour look they all had. I thought it was just the ministers that looked like that this was really remarkable. They looked so bitter that I thought they must have been angry that I was there. A couple weeks later, I carefully brought this up to my daughter-in-law, and she started laughing. Her response was like this: "They weren't mad at you! They always look like that! You've just been away long enough that you forgot!" Wow. And thinking about it, she was right. Then, I have been back for other family funerals. The thing that scares me is that I have very elderly parents-in-law: my first husband's parents and my present husband's father. I really love them. So when they pass away, I will be going back for their funerals, but that will be the last of walking into that church. Never again. I hope all my in-laws live to be 200. |
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holly |
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Posts: 99 (12/11/08 14:19:12) |
yes i went for a wedding cos i promised long ago to be this womans bridesmaid and she still wanted me to. It was in a different church building but the same
crowd
It was awful - i wasnt expecting it to be that bad I had to wear this dress and make-up (ok i know thats silly to get upset over - to put into context thats the only time i've worn a dress or make-up in about 5 years its just not me) and look all girly, and then the wedding itself was like a tag team of 3 different vicars (his church vicar, her church elder and the one from the church they married in) complete with charismatic worship session, words of knowledge and faith healing. And sexist comments about the man being the head of the marriage. - if i hadnt been sat at the front in a bridesmaid dress i would have walked out. My friend who came with me has one uncle who's a vicar and another who's a monk so he's used to church stuff but he was totally freaked out at the end of the service. And i cant even sit through regular hymns so it was horrible, and i totally freaked out, was horrible to everyone at the reception - started loads of arguments over how the man shouldnt be the head of the marriage - and generally made a total fool of myself. Really embarassing and not happy how i acted. ... never again! |
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freedsorta |
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Posts: 42 (12/11/08 16:47:27) |
By the time I went to the first funeral, I had already thrown out all my skirts/dresses long before. I am seriously surprised they let me sing there in pants!
Hadn't thought about that before.
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lozza |
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Posts: 3281 (12/12/08 01:20:54) Musical Mantric |
I don't go back to any of the old fellowships. I no longer see the point, as I don't agree with them.
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tandc90 |
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Posts: 757 (12/12/08 07:02:40) exPc Fan |
The last time I was in my church was the day our eyes were opened fully about it all so we haven't been back plus we live several states away now. I do
enjoy watching local pente and charismatic services on TV occasionally just to test myself. I avoided that type of thing for a long, long time after I left
though.
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boustro |
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Posts: 4138 (12/12/08 08:39:30) There are some who call me .... Timmay! |
I've been to church services with family, just out of respect. My parents know where I stand, and we've talked about it a few times, with varying
degrees of success (mutual understanding-wise, not convert them to my point of view-wise!). My wife's family knows somewhat, though I haven't really
discussed anything with them. Not much point, seems to me, since it wouldn't change anyone's mind (mine or theirs), and would probably only add tension
to the relationships. So, if we're staying out there on a Sunday, I don't feel like making "a statement" or anything, at this point, so I
just tag along.
The kinds of churches they attend are not too crazy, anyway. Pretty annoying music and sermons, but not much (if any) tongues etc. They're AG, where there seems to be a trend (at least in a lot of churches) of toning down all that stuff. They're trying to be more respectable, I think. Not to mention, more and more people are quietly wondering and doubting about all that junk, anyway (IMO).
Tim
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CaroG87 |
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Posts: 673 (12/12/08 18:12:32) exPc Fan |
Not the church I grew up in. My parents left it about a dozen years ago -- long story, but even my dad had had enough of this extremely arrogant pastor. He
made the others look like cream puffs.
Occasionally (rare occasions, mind you), I have gone to my parents' current congregation -- same denomination, but a totally different outlook from how I grew up. Even though I know some of the people there from my parents, I go in loaded for bear. It's my security blanket. I don't go looking for a fight, but I don't mind getting in one if I have to. Most of the people are actually very nice, but there's always the new person who goes, "So, do you live around here? Oh, you do? Do you have a home church?" The eyes narrow, the evil smile comes on my face and I say, "Yes, I go to St. Whomever Catholic in Collegetown." And I shut up and watch the little eye twitch or tic or some something that tells me they had no idea. It's evil of me, but I do enjoy it...... |
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maryalaminx |
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Posts: 350 (12/12/08 22:59:19) exPc Fan |
I won't go back to my old church unless one of my siblings is married there. I have been to other churches with my family a couple of times, usually for a
special occasion, but I always wear makeup and a crucifix and a bored expression to prevent any confusion. If someone comes up to me, I smile and say very
politely that I am Roman Catholic. I only turn snarky if pressed.
~~~
 Orthodoxy is the death of intelligence. |
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Taco Fred |
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Posts: 1074 (12/14/08 12:41:04) exPc Fan |
I have went back to both of my sisters ACE graduations. I have also attended a few funerals of family members. I will not go to a service of any kind though. I
will only go back for funerals now.
Celebrating 25 years of being Pentecost free!
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agnosticostal |
re: | ||
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Posts: 127 (12/14/08 13:11:14) |
I haven't been back to my old church, but I went to a pente church for my uncle's funeral. They practically turned it into a mini-church service.
disgusting...
Last Edited By: agnosticostal
01/28/09 15:51:08.
Edited 1 times.
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creatrix |
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Posts: 933 (12/15/08 07:25:41) exPc Fan |
I went with my folks to pick up some stuff at their Church one time - as most of you know, I was never Pente, and they are just your basic Presbyterians - but
I got there during a Taze service and it totally freaked me out. I couldn't even guess at why, but I just wanted out.
[url=http://www.meez.com/theonlycreatrix][img]http://images.meez.com/user/6/0/5/0/9/0/9/6050909_bodyshot_175x233.gif[/img][/url]
_______________________________________________________ We are all agnostic... it's just that some people don't admit it. _______________________________________________________ |
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brainy |
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Posts: 35 (12/18/08 23:40:12) |
I have been back numerous times. No one bothers me. Recently, I returned for a chili supper. Actually, I think no one really knows how to talk to me so I am
ignored. It is nice. Last year I went to a Pente funeral for a rather popular local singer and a long time family friend. It was disgusting. The funeral turned
into a worship service, complete with altar call, bombastic sermon, lots of clapping and shouting and the usual amount of "you will burn in Hell"
stuff. In reality the deceased was rather a fun loving person and I think would have been uncomfortable with the service. My parents admitted it was too much.
I may attend the Christmas service this weekend. If I do I may return to this thread and give an account of the service.
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RogerDodger |
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Posts: 121 (12/19/08 13:05:43) |
My answer...HELL NO !!!!
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CaroG87 |
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Posts: 679 (12/19/08 19:16:49) exPc Fan |
Brainy, that sounds so much like my grandmother's service. One pastor was just bursting at the seams to do an altar call -- I could tell. Oh boy, was I
ticked!
I recently heard from a friend who is an associate pastor in the denomination in which I was raised. His senior pastor (I'll call him Rev X) and wife lost an infant a few weeks ago, and had the funeral back in their hometown. The pastor's wife was raised in a different Pente denomination and her family's pastor did part of the service. Rev X walked out of the service, called my friend and said, "Okay, I have had enough. I had to get up and walk out -- it was too much. I cannot believe he turned my baby's funeral into a whooping and hollering circus." Yes, this is a PENTECOSTAL minister saying this!!!!! When my friend said this, I was like, "Get out of town. You are joking, right?" No. He was not. My parents' church is having their thing this Sunday morning, so I don't have to go because of my own church (not that I would anyway, but....). I gotta admit, their pastor is very open and progressive, and it's kind of refreshing. He had a severe heart attack about 18 months ago and is still recuperating. He gets tired a lot more easily than he did previously, and so he adjusts the schedule as needed. For the whole month of December, no Sunday evening services, only one Sunday morning service, nothing on Wednesdays. There's not a pastor I knew growing up who would have dared consider that. They'd rather have another coronary for Jesus first. Maybe they're starting to realize they can't truly be shepherds to the flock if they're exhausted. I give him lots of credit for having the guts to say, "Hey, I can't do it all, and so some things have to change." |
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ADH2000 |
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Posts: 278 (12/20/08 00:54:10) exPc Fan |
Nope, unless they handcuff and muzzle me, I just cannot see myself wanting
to torture myself like that EVER again! I'm so passed the lunatic stage.
The TRUTH can be dealt with; but a lie cannot.
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scribe2007 |
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Posts: 1138 (12/23/08 01:48:23) exPc Fan |
Wow. I think it's only when something tragic happens and the p/c church responds inappropriately that the truth hits home, how mean and cruel p/c is. P/C just does not address suffering, or have a workable theology that allows for suffering. It has pat phrases that it flings out...but they don't work in reality. 
Cruelty I believe is just one of the dark fruits of pentecostalism. - PepperMintPaty
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