Upside down inside out and backwards

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DiamondGirllovesHarleys	Upside down inside out and backwards	Lead	[-]
Posts: 680 (10/30/08 19:02:27) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	Tags : None Do any of you ever feel like that your life was like this or is like this? I still deal with alot of things. I got hired at a casino here in town,I have the potential to make good real good money working there. However growing up I was always told gambling was a sin well I have been doing it pretty regular lately so I figured if you can't beat em join me right. Well some in my family aint too happy with me doing it and they are praying for me and this gambling thing. Anyway I didn't even mean to get off on that track why I started writing this is because I am wondering if when any of you were going to churchs in the denom did you ever feel like you were upside down inside out and backwards? Do you still deal with this feeling? I still get feelings that I can't really explain sometimes. I still sometimes well alot of times I feel like I am just not good enough. I battle with that all the time. I havent really slept in three days and I am not sure why. It happens sometimes but sometimes these feelings of fear come over me like I'm doing something wrong. I can't really talk about this someplace else. Sometimes I feel like something is wrong but I know it aint. Do any of you feel this way? Hello from http://www.thehauntedcastle.yuku.com
Taco Fred		#1	[-]
Posts: 1021 (10/31/08 02:50:12) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	I could only imagine the pentes reaction if a casino opened up in my hometown. There would be sermons for days on gambling along with prayer meetings to stop anyone from thinking about gambling. The pentes would be hiding in the parking lots just to check to see what backsliders along with church member's were going to the casino. But to answer your question, I was taught that you are never good enough for the lawd. Even though you have obeyed Acts 2:38, if you are out of line with even one scripture in the bible you will go to hell. I know people that have every single interpretation of the bible that has ever been published. They will spend their entire evenings combing over every translation for each scripture because they are so paranoid that there may be something missing with the KJV. I watched my parents agonize over very simple decisions because they were afraid they would be out of the will of gawd. My mom become so paranoid that she was going to be deceived by the freaking bible because the debil would put thoughts into your head. We were taught that the enemy is at your doorstep just waiting to be allowed into your house. I can fully understand the inside out feelings you have. They lingered with me for several years after walking away from church once and for all. I am very lucky I did not commit suicide back in those days. Celebrating 25 years of being Pentecost free!
CharlesinCharge		#2	[-]
Posts: 23 (10/31/08 09:57:57) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	My life was like the TV series 24! I swear not one day went by without drama and chaos. Everyone always in your business. Basically I moved away for like 6 years, converted to Orthodoxy, came back as a different, stronger person and they all leave me alone. I know they think I'm satan now but it makes me laugh! I move in different circles now and if they ever see me I let them know I'm done with their foolishness. I see in some of their eyes an almost congratulatory twinkle like" you made it, I wish I was strong enough to leave". But for the most part its like being around Jr. High kids. These people are well into their 30's and still are into the Christian rap/rock lifestyle, every new fad that comes along and it's pretty silly. It's so easy to see how decieved they are. So I say do your own thing, be yourself. You will probably be shunned and all alone for awhile but God was with me every step of the way. You will find new, loyal friends. Not the P/C who will turn you in like the brown-shirts they are. Remember it won't kill you but it will make you stronger!
stubborn envelope		#3	[-]
Posts: 1268 (10/31/08 12:03:11) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	I also used to feel very paranoid. I thought if I had one belief that was out of line with the Bible, I had been deceived and would go to hell. Getting to Heaven would be an extraordinary feat. Lately I HAVE been feeling inside out....I used to retain my self esteem even when I went through severe depressions, even to the point of being hospitalized and diagnosed with major depression with psychosis (the diagnosis has since changed.) Now I feel like my self esteem is draining away and I have no worth. I used to miss the darkness, though. Sometimes returning to it was like wrapping up in a familiar blanket. James "The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed." -- Albert Einstein
scribe2007		#4	[-]
Posts: 1053 (10/31/08 14:38:17) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	DiamondGirllovesHarleys wrote: Sometimes I feel like something is wrong but I know it aint. Do any of you feel this way? I often feel like this. I'm sure it's just a hangover from p/c; but it takes an effort to look at my situation and say, "no, everything is okay." In this regard, I'm glad I found Ex-P so soon after leaving church. It has helped me to look at things rationally. I actually feel that p/c is what's upside down and back to front. I feel like they twisted everything so that love was hate and evil was good. They have got everything backwards. So although I still feel lost as to my identity and future, I feel like at least I am back on the right track. Cruelty I believe is just one of the dark fruits of pentecostalism. - PepperMintPaty
agnosticostal		#5	[-]
Posts: 115 (10/31/08 15:38:24) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	did you ever feel like you were upside down inside out and backwards? Do you still deal with this feeling? I still get feelings that I can't really explain sometimes. I felt like this a lot when I first came out of UPC. The feeling that you don't know which side is up... What's right? What's wrong? Who's lying to you? Who do I trust? It takes a while before life starts to make sense again... Ah, yes...the feeling that something is always wrong...that chronic anxiety. that's pretty much all it is. When I try to relax sometimes I can still hear a preacher in my mind saying "Don't get too comfortable!! Don't go to sleep! Stay vigilant! Don't let the enemy in!" There's this chronic feeling that if I let go just for a little bit and relax, that I'll get "addicted" to it and get out of control, and eventually turn into a horrible human being.
DiamondGirllovesHarleys		#6	[-]
Posts: 683 (10/31/08 20:26:33) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	Exactly agnosticostal that is exactly what I am talking about. You can'tlet your guard down. I wish sometimes I couldl just float away. Hello from http://www.thehauntedcastle.yuku.com
lozza		#7	[-]
Posts: 3189 (11/01/08 01:19:34) Musical Mantric Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	Not sure if this is relevant here but I struggle a lot with the curse mentality, thinking that God is blocking my way and placing obstacles along my path.
DiamondGirllovesHarleys		#8	[-]
Posts: 686 (11/01/08 07:51:12) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	I can see where you get that. We were always told if we didn't toe the line for God that we were cursed and nothing we did would prosper. We were told all the curses in the book of dueteronomy would come upon us for disobeying God. You know something how can God curse us with old covenant curses when we as christians who have accepted Christ and have a new covenant(new testament)be cursed with old covenant(old testament curses)? Besides that that was to the children of Isreal not to new testament believers. Christ said he didn't come to abolish the law but fullfill the law that all that was on him. None of that makes sense to me it is like they are saying Christ is a liar. Its like your not doing it our way so this is what that really means. Control and manipulation is what it is. I guess it takes along time to get over it I was raised in it,I spent all my life scared the devil was going to get me,I had nightmares all the time as a child,scared of the dark,scared to be alone. All because of the devil is going to get you teachings. To this day I still sleep with the tv on for light total darkness scares me. Hello from http://www.thehauntedcastle.yuku.com
Looking4truth		#9	[-]
Posts: 1869 (11/01/08 09:44:43) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	Something that has helped me TREMENDOUSLY...I'm taking a Philosophy class this semester at school and it has helped me more than i can describe. Not only has it helped me to accept ME and my new mindset, but also it is helping me to be more empathetic to those who feel they need religion. Pascal wus clever kitteh hu wus laik: "I am not knoin if teh Ceiling Cat is reel." Oh noes! But Pascal was thinkin an thinkin, an he wus laik "If I is beleefin in teh Ceiling Cat, and he is reel, I will be gettin cheezburger. But if I has no beleefin in teh Ceiling Cat, and he is reel, I will be getting pwned. If there no Ceiling Cat, no matter anywai. I think I is beleefin in teh Ceiling Cat."
DiamondGirllovesHarleys		#10	[-]
Posts: 687 (11/01/08 12:23:01) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	I am the type that I need something to believe in with all the death and illness I have had amoung family and friends I need something to believe in. Hello from http://www.thehauntedcastle.yuku.com
Conservatarian		#11	[-]
Posts: 799 (11/01/08 13:15:16) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	And here people think that it's just muslims who are against gambling. I've even heard that some people believe that playing games with dice is wrong, because it involves chance. The title of this thread reminds of a song. http://www.lyricsfreak.co...upside+down_20040115.html Here are christianized lyrics for it, in order to demonstrate the commonality between christian contemporary, and pop songs. "I said upside down Youre turning me Youre giving love instinctively Around and round youre turning me Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Instinctively you give to me The love that I need I cherish the moments with you Respectfully I see to thee Im aware that you're blessing me. No one makes me feel like you do Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round I know you got charm and appeal You always play the field Im crazy you are mine As long as the sun continues to shine Theres a place in my heart for you Thats the bottomline Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Instinctively you give to me The love that I need I cherish the moments with you Respectfully I see to thee Im aware that youre cheating But no one makes me feel like you do Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Upside down Lord, you turn me Inside out And round and round Upside down youre turning me Youre giving love instinctively Around and round youre turning me I see to thee respectfully Upside down youre turning me Youre giving love instinctively Around and round youre turning me I see to thee respectfully I said a upside down youre turning me Youre giving love instinctively Around and round youre turning me." Last Edited By: Conservatarian 11/01/08 13:19:29. Edited 1 times.
DiamondGirllovesHarleys		#12	[-]
Posts: 688 (11/01/08 19:21:34) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	Yeah I remember that song Hello from http://www.thehauntedcastle.yuku.com
lozza		#13	[-]
Posts: 3197 (11/03/08 01:36:59) Musical Mantric Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	Great song by Diana Ross. I guess it takes along time to get over it I was raised in it,I spent all my life scared the devil was going to get me,I had nightmares all the time as a child,scared of the dark,scared to be alone. All because of the devil is going to get you teachings. To this day I still sleep with the tv on for light total darkness scares me. Same here.
geoffreylaw313		#14	[-]
Posts: 331 (11/03/08 08:10:34) exPc Fan Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts	I think the vertigo feeling is some what of a norm when leaving P/C. A lot of the views pentecostals hold are pretty @ss backwards so as you take off the "pentecostal goggles" everything would and should seem upside down inside out. Just like when I leave a movie theater, it takes a couple seconds for my eyes to adjust to the daylight. Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they? George Carlin I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect. George Carlin

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Upside down inside out and backwards

Upside down inside out and backwards

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